Attention Smart, Successful Women: Here’s How You Can Instantly Be More Influential At Work
Whether you work in an office or you’re an entrepreneur, let’s just say that being a woman has its own unique set of ‘problems’ when it comes to being taken seriously.
For some, it’s overcoming shyness when speaking up in a group meeting. For others, it’s fighting nerves when you’re in front of other VPs and execs. You wonder why you feel this way even though a part of you knows you’re on ‘their level’–but this other part of you wonders: “Will they really listen to what I have to say? Do they even care?”
I’ve found that it doesn’t matter how ‘successful’ you are on paper. How good-looking you are. Or even how well you dress. These feelings of ‘not good enough’ come up and it throws us off our game, and no amount of reading ‘Lean In’ is going to help soothe us.
And the worst part? Women are taught to believe that we ‘should already know’ how to have great social and leadership skills. We should ‘already know’ how to instantly connect with people.
But no one teaches us.
And even more sneaky is the fact that even when we do KNOW what we want, and what we want to say–we don’t know how to say it, and we don’t know how to do it. What about how people will perceive this? What if they talk over and interrupt me? What if they don’t respect me?
But I remember even when I worked at an agency and now that I’m the CEO of my own business, there are a few things that I do that make all the difference when it comes to influencing people and captivating them with every word that you say, which is essential to be continuing to grow the business and transform people’s lives.
And today, I’m going to share one of them with you that you can implement immediately.
What is it?
Well…have you ever noticed how when you speak, you talk as if you’re asking a question…
…Even if it’s a statement?
Most people never pay attention to this. But the TONE of your voice can matter 10x than the words you’re saying.
Just think for a moment, and imagine a woman in your life you consider to be influential. She seems to just KNOW how to command respect. She’s powerful, but isn’t pushy or annoying. Clients love her, and so does everyone who works for her. You know she’s ‘leadership material’ not just because of her job title, but because the people who are around her trust her, like her, and WANT to do anything to help her.
Then think of another woman. It’s like the SECOND she opens her mouth, everyone wants to take a nap. If you haven’t heard of the podcast ‘Serial’, there’s an episode where a lawyer is talking and just the TONE OF HER VOICE basically botched an entire case, and now her client has a life sentence and could possibly be innocent.
She’s talking about crucial information that could change the course of her client’s life, but she sounds whiny, sing-song-y, and exhausting.
You have to remember that humans–whether it’s a jury or your husband–NEED to be engaged. WANT to be led. And MUST feel something in order to be inspired and take action on what YOU say. And even if what you’re saying is ‘great’, if the tone of your voice grinds on somebody’s nerves, you’ve already lost the game.
So here’s what I recommend you do:
- Get out your iPhone or any recording device and record your voice. Either read something from an article, practice a sales pitch, or talk about something you want to say in a meeting.
- Listen to your recording. How does your voice sound? What I want you to do is ONLY focus on if you sound ‘authoritative’–so your sentences ending on a ‘down-note’ or if you’re using the question inflection. Here’s a great example from Olivia Fox about what you voice should sound like to communicate authority.
- Do the recording again, and practicing ending your sentences on that ‘down-note’.
- Now, practice it on EVERYONE you come into contact with for 1 day. What happened? How are people responding to you? Is it different?
This may seem like a very small ‘tweak’, but it can make a WORLD of a difference. It can mean being seen as ‘leadership material’, a high-status person, and a key influencer–which usually means the ability to make more money, get people to WANT to help you, and create a real impact in people’s lives.
See, the reason why I’m even talking about this is because I realized a long time ago that women have a unique ability to get out of their heads…and into their HEARTS.
We can be both empathetic AND analytical. We can be both compassionate AND get shit done. Having one does NOT mean that you don’t have the other. And being proud of ‘not having emotions’ I believe is the quickest way to cutting people off from believing in what you say, engaging with you, and developing meaningful relationships. And this isn’t just in work–but with your family, your partner, your friends, and anyone you come into contact with.
Which is why last Thursday I told you about my new 3 month group coaching program Instant Influence–for smart, successful women who want to be more charismatic, become a better leader, and influence and persuade anyone–even if you’re highly sensitive and introverted. The program will be from Jan 5 – March 30.
Click here to learn more about Instant Influence, and simply follow the directions at the bottom of the email if you want to be a part of this unique program. Like I mentioned, I’ll be selecting up to 20 women, which means that I may only select 10 based on quality and who I feel will be the most successful. (Not to mention, that’s extra time and attention for you). And given how quickly women have responded, this offer is only ‘open’ until December 22.
This is a highly-personal, in-depth partnership with me and a chance to be surrounded by other women who really ‘get it’. As you’ll see when you learn more, these are the kinds of things that get swept under the rug and not talked about, leaving so many of us feeling helpless and like we have to ‘man up’ and shut down our femininity.
But that’s not what being a woman–or a leader–is about.
You CAN be charismatic, without being loud, extroverted, gregarious, or flirty. You can USE it to get the right people to like you and trust you instantly, and want to do what you want them to do.
You CAN command respect and authority–without being labeled as a worrier, difficult to work with, a ball buster, or a hardass and push important people on your team and in your life away.
You CAN influence and persuade ANYONE–face to face and with what you write. This is one of THE most highly valuable skills you can learn–a skill people have paid me in the hundreds of thousands for.
You CAN handle difficult people and come to a place of mutual understanding and respect while staying true to yourself and your values–even if at first it’s uncomfortable and scary.
And you CAN be the leader that you’re supposed to be–whether you are one now, or aspiring to be one. You can draw the best out of people, magnetically pull them towards you, and make an incredible impact at work and in your personal life. People say you’ve lived a life worth living if you’ve changed just one person’s life. I say that you’ve really made it when you can impact everyone around you and inspire them to do the extraordinary.
Click here to learn more about Instant Influence., and simply follows the instructions at the bottom of the email if you want to be a part of this unique program. (Just reply to this email after you’re done reading)
I can’t wait to hear from you and help you transform into the influential leader and woman you’re supposed to be.