Got a question for you…

As I alluded in my email the other week, I’ve been obsessing over Game of Thrones recently.

When I tell people this, they think I’m some kind of fantasy fan or perhaps an uber nerd. But–while I am both of those things–that’s not what makes me eager to watch episode after episode of the show.

So what is it?

I jokingly said to my fiancé the other day: “Watching Game of Thrones is like me doing homework.” And while I sound delusional, the truth is that the show is a perfect example of what POLITICS are– aka, all the ways people deceive, betray, and screw each other over. Which is basically what I think about all day.

And more importantly, why knowing how to be socially savvy is one of the most important skills you could ever develop. In fact, if you don’t, it’s easy to be blindsided by people, passed over for career opportunities, and betrayed by people you thought were your friends and allies.

It’s exactly like being in a relationship. Where if you stop paying attention to your partner–despite how  much you ‘love’ each other–just watch as it all slowly unravels. This is why there are so many articles about being ‘in-tune’ with your partner, their body language, their ‘bids’ for attention. When you don’t respond, all these tiny little resentments build up like a poison and destroy it from the inside out.

But back to Game of Thrones.

Having ‘political skill’ is slightly different than ‘social skill’.

For example: You might think of yourself as a fun, outgoing person who can easily make friends. Pretty easy to see that you don’t have much trouble getting to know people and creating rapport with them.

But what happens when you get fired from your job? What happens when you get turned down for a promotion? What happens when someone on your team doesn’t like you?

What’s going on there?

These are the people that OTHER people describe as: “Nice, cool, friendly…but they just don’t GET it.”

What they’re alluding to is that you don’t know how to play the game. The invisible game, with the unwritten rules.

It’s not because you’re not a friendly person.

There is something much DEEPER going on under the surface.

It’s like when I advise one of my clients about dealing with the CEO of his company. I can point out exactly what’s going on in the CEO’s head and how to devise a strategy around it. Compare that to when other people ask for things at the wrong time, don’t realize they’re talking too much in a meeting, or bring up a topic that ruffles feathers.

What’s so maddening about all of this is that these are INVISIBLE, UNWRITTEN rules. And you are expected to know them.

Which is why I wanted to share this great article I found from another woman with you all called “7 Unwritten Rules of the Office Your Boss Will Never Tell You”. It’s an exact example of what it means to ‘get smart’ and start to pay attention to what’s going on around you…use your social, communication, and relationship skills to your advantage…and never be blindsided by a negative situation again. Even better–see it coming before it even gets started.

We haven’t talked TOO much here about ‘politics’ at Instantly Irresistible, but it’s the next level after you establish your confidence and your social skills and charisma. In fact, it’s that part of life we all like to gloss over because it’s so damn uncomfortable.

So tell me: When have you been ‘blindsided’ at work? Whether a co-worker screwed you over, you got turned down for a promotion, or you get weird vibes from a boss. I want to hear.

Felicia

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